Friday, February 25, 2011

Apologizing and Forgiveness...Neither is Easy

My brother-in-law Tyson Sturgeon sent me a link to this story and interview from Good Morning America.  In it I learned of Matt Kravchuk, a sophomore basketball player for Holy Family University in Philadelphia, and John O'Connor, the team's coach.  Last month in a practice, O'Connor shoved Kravchuk, knocking him to the ground.  What has followed has been accusations and legal actions, culminating in the coach's resignation.

This came hours after both men appeared on ABC's Good Morning America.  In that interview, George Stephanopolous prompted the coach to apologize, at which time O'Connor said to Kravchuk, "The main thing is that this was an accident..I was just trying to make us a better team, make us more competitive and in doing so an accident happened.  And it was unintentional by me, and I'm really sorry that it happened.  If I could take it back I certainly would.  But again, it was an accident and I'm really sorry it happened."

"To be honest, it's kind of hard to accept your apology, just because you claim it's justified, you claim you weren't crossing the line...I can't play for you anymore because as your player I'm supposed to be able to respect you and I don't feel I can do that anymore."

In the end, I'm not posting this to spark a conversation as to whether the coach's actions were justified, wether he ought to have resigned, or whether other further legal and disciplinary steps need to be taken. What I want to draw our attention to is something that Tyson pointed out to me.  He put it exceedingly well, so I'll leave you with his words:
"I just thought it was fascinating in two regards, especially when I think about my own life:
  1. How difficult it is to truly apologize and say you were wrong and feel it in your heart and let it be what it is, and
  2. How difficult it can be to forgive, let someone say they made a mistake, and let that be what it is and live with the hurt that is still there.
This back and forth really made it hit home for me how much we need the Gospel to penetrate our hearts to be able to do both well."

No comments: